SLAPSHOT RECAP: Blue Jackets Vs. The Boston Bums

The Columbus Blue Jackets had their opening game for the season last night against the Boston Bums (Bruins). It was great event — there were strange men stuffed in tuxedos, people drinking outside the stadium and like always, the horde of cautiously optimistic Blue Jacket fans as far the eye could see.

The night started with the team coming out to that super weird pausing bass noise that is in all the thriller/horror/post apocalyptic movie trailers lately — bschwoooooo…. bschwoooooo…. bschwoooooo…. and instead of Godzilla or the Cloverfield aliens coming out of the insane 1980s Tron light set up — our beloved Columbus Blue Jackets came out. 

The arena, packed to the brim with 18,000 Blue Jacket fans, erupted as our favorite players came out. You know them! Hartnell, Foligno, Saad and of course Bob. While the few Bruins fans in the arena frowned on, we all cheered like maniacs. Our team was back, baby! And there’s so much hope!

The boys in blue start swinging within the first three minutes — center Weinberg scores assisted by Jones and Werenski. The arena explodes! Gimme a hell yeah! We were looking good!  Really good! Then a hoser Bruin came — had a fast break on Bob 1-on-1 and boom! Just like that Bob saves the shot!

I’m thinking, “Hey, we’re actually good this year!  Is it to early to think this?”

As the first period came to an end CBJ had a power play in the last 3 minutes and shit, we capitalized big time. Cam Atkinson slaps one between the pipes with the assist by Foligno. One passionate CBJ fan screams “CBJ! CBJ! That’s what I’m talking about! The Bruins still suck!” as the first period came to an end.

As the second period started, CBJ fans were feeling good but those dirty bums made sure we didn’t get to cocky by scoring within the first 2 minutes. “That’s okay,” I’m thinking in the press booth, “We’re still up and it’s just one goal. Bob’s looking really good otherwise and so is everyone else.”

Then bam about halfway through the second period Seth Jones shoots a laser through heavy traffic and scores. What a shot! The biscuit flew between three defenders and right past that bum goalie. We were all feeling high after that.

We were duped though, and should have hung on to that feeling as long as we could because boy was it a hard crash after that buzz. Before the second period could even come to an end the Bruins scored two more goals and we couldn’t capitalized on a big time power play. The bruins got hot and we couldn’t do anything about it. It was tied up 3-3.

Third period started and we were hanging on for dear life, oh lord take me now! About halfway through the period those dirty Bruins scored again and damn it — We’re down 3-4 and it was downhill from there. Within 5 minutes the Bruins made an easy goal and people started turning, people were finished and started billowing out of the arena like mice from a sinking ship. (That’s a thing right?)

A distinct voice was heard off in the distance “You guys have got to get it together! Come on!” Bob was pulled for a final hoo-ra to play catch up but the damage was done. We didn’t succeed and the Bruins got a break, slid one in nice and easy. It was over.

We lost 3-6.

So I’m sitting here thinking, is this an omen for the whole season? As CBJ fan I say no. We’re here through thick and thin and we’ve got all season to build on.

Leaving the opening game with our shoulders slumped I heard all the usual things us CBJ fans say every-damn-year after a game such as this one “UGH, we are bad!” and “They can’t be as bad as last year.” But that’s okay because they’re our team and they give us all they got and we give them all we got and we’re glad they’re back.

On the plus side three goals were made so we all get free chili from Roosters today.

Since that’s why we all go to Roosters. For the chili.

/Brady Hanson 

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