“‘Twas the Night Before ComFest”- A poem to fend off the rain

‘Twas the night before ComFest, when all through the park
volunteers scurried about in the dark.
The beer tents were raised by the entrance with care,
awaiting the hundreds of kegs almost there.

The food trucks were parked with anticipation
of the upcoming weekend’s three-day celebration.
And stages, erected all over the grounds,
with equipment set up to unleash groovy sounds.
When out from a speaker, louder than heck
came static, some feedback, then “one, two, check, check.”

The booths were lined up on the sidewalks and streets
For organizations, craft vendors, and sweets.
Some will sell art, some will ask you to vote,
some may give out a free wristband or tote.
The Jeni’s so cold, the Mikey’s so hot,
The smoothies so smooth, the air scented with pot.
The Fishboats so tartared, the shakeups so sour;
the police looking on from their mobile cop tower.
Towels laying out, topped by people so chill.
A shout of “whoop whoop” out from Juggalo Hill.

I look into the sky while dreading the threat
that precipitation could make the ground wet.
And in the morning a committee will announce
that the rain has collected in sufficient amounts:
“Stay off Bozo, off Solar, off Live Arts; they’re damp.
We’ve closed the Gazeebo, don’t go near the Off-Ramp.
Do not slide in the mud, do not splash in the puddles.
In fact, keep off the grass between Goodale and Buttles.
If you hear lightning please don’t argue and pout.
Just be chill or we’re going to kick you all out.”
So I cross all my fingers, and hope for the best
That rain won’t wash paint off of anyone’s chest.

And I heard from a tent as I walked off that night,
“Happy ComFest to all!
Anyone have a light?”

Shoutout to benjisaucet of Reddit Columbus for whipping up this little number.

As far as the rain goes, ComFest is pretty much barreling through it, hoping for the best. Bozo Stage will be closed until 5:30 though as a safety precaution. They’ll reassess the weather again to see if it’s able to be reopened.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY