Dear 614

Welcome to “Dear (614)”! Have a question about college chaos, love life insanities, or navigating the world after graduation? Send ’em our way here, and we’ll dish out some unfiltered, possibly ludicrous advice that’ll make you laugh, cringe, or wonder why you even asked.

What should I do if my bf is a stage 5 clinger?
– Looking for space

That’s a great question. Clearly, you don’t like that he’s so clingy so I say dumb his ass. The right person is out there for you somewhere. But if for some reason you think this guy is THE™️ guy, then just be honest and communicate your feelings in a nice way, and hopefully, he will back off.

When is the right time to start farting in front of my bf?
– Juicy Jess

Ah, the question that has been asked for ages. I, of course, have a few of my own questions for you:

1. Does he fart in front of you?
2. Have you been dating for at least a year?
3. Do you live together?
4. Do you sleep together?
5. Have you ever farted while a dog was in the same room, blamed it on the dog, and waited to see what your boyfriend’s reaction was?

If you answered yes to 3 or more of these questions, then it’s time.

There’s a girl I like who has a boyfriend. They seem on and off, and she definitely flirts with me. Her friends think we should be together, what do I do?
– Girl Probs

Looks like you’re in a bit of a tricky situation, huh? What stands out to me first is the fact that her friends think you should be together. This means she is clearly talking about you to them. But she is in a relationship currently. The way I see it, you have three options:

1. You tell this girl you have feelings for her, she dumps her current boyfriend for you, and all is well in the world if you can live with the guilt of being a homewrecker. 
2. You tell this girl you have feelings for her, she doesn’t dump her boyfriend, and now things are forever awkward between you guys.
3. You don’t do anything, but this helps you to move on to someone else. 

In my humble opinion, all of these options are valid. My fav is #1, though. If you do go for it best of luck to you and let me know what happens!